Shitty Experience

For all the times I spent without you
were the times it was cold and good
Stars wont shine but the sun comes up
No pressures and no more plop.

We truly separated ways,
just facebook where you are vain.
I never felt hate, only pain
But t'was before, no to claim.

Posted a portrait of myself
No intentions, just to share
And then you suddenly pops up,
All I felt was my heart out of shelf.

I dont know why I am happy
I cant explain these heartstrings
Yes, you were there and I am here
And we never chose to be near.

I don't know why I am wearing this,
I don't know why I am waiting,
I don't know why I am standing here.
I really don't know, all I know is just you will never come and you never take your last words seriously.

After my not so surprising everyday routine,
I felt alive again, I felt uniquely happy.
It's all because of you.
Because you made me believe that you are true.

But you are not. Maybe because it's me, you will never take me seriously. I'm asking myself why. Why I am feeling this way? Do I really deserve this? I never treated you like shit. I never play with your feelings like you always did to me. I don't know why I always close my eyes and opens my heart to you. You are my every wrong that I am willing to take all over again without correcting any of it. I felt you dumped me. I felt unimportant. I felt that i am JUST your "past time" when things get worse. When you don't have any to lean on to or to cling. I hate this feeling. The feeling of taken for granted. You know why? Because I never did anything to feel this way in return.

I wrote this because I wanted to free my feelings. And if ever you read this, thanks for making me feel like a trash. Bull shit! Here's to more of your games! 🖕

This will be the last time I will open my heart to you. I don't have time for your shits. Thank you for this lesson, though. See you around my player man.