Friday, December 19, 2014

My big drama

It's been almost 3 months. Three months of just nothing. Akala ko yun na! Ipinagkait pa rin sakin, pero alam kong may reason lahat ng yun and I already accepted the fact that 'I'm only the BEST FRIEND Material and not the GIRL FRIEND one" Minsan, nagtatanong ako sa sarili ko, what's wrong? ano pa bang kulang? pero wala namang sumasagot at walang may alam ng sagot.

Nakakalungkot? oo minsan. Kasi, yung tipong alam mo na okay na eh. Tas may sisingit nanaman na problema os sitwasyon sa buhay nyo kaya ayun, naudlot na naman. Pero wala naman akong magagawa kung ganon talaga ang gustong mangyari ng destiny eh, diba. Ang dapat ko lang gawin ay ang tumanggap.

Masaya na ako sa kanya ngayon, pero kanina habang nakahiga ako, napaisip ako. Paano kaya kung nagmatigas akong wag nyang ituloy? Paano kaya kung hindi kaya ako pumayag? Mapipigilan ko kaya sya o susundin pa rin nya kung ano man yung naging desisyon nya ngayon? Ang dami kong tanong na hindi masagot sagot at ayoko ayoko ayokong tanungin sa kanya lahat ng mga tanong ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit, siguro takot akong malaman ang sagot nya. Sabi nung mga kaibigan ko, hindi mo malalaman hangga't di mo itatry. EXPECT FOR WORST. Totoo naman diba, tama naman sila. Pero ang hindi ko maintindihan, bakit hindi ko magawang mag-expect for worst. Bakit sobrang takot akong mareject. Personally, alam kong dapat matuto kang tanggapin lahat ng flaws, negative na mga pangyayaring dadating sa buhay mo. Alam ko yun and naging adviser na rin ako ng ilan kong kaibigan. Pero hindi ko alam kung bakit hanggang ngayon, di ko pa rin sya maapply sa sarili ko.

Simula elementary ako hindi na ako tinantanan ng tadhana. Ako lagi yung kaibigan na laging nandyan para sa isang kaibigan. Yung tipong "the one they can SURELY count on" hanggang ngayon, I'm trapped sa ganong sitwasyon.

Hindi ko alam kung hanggang kelan ako aasa sa wala, kung hanggang kela yung ganitong feeling at kung kelan kaya ako mapopromote sa pagiging girl friend, hindi lang best friend.

2 days from now, birthday ko na. Naeexcite ako na hindi. Sana hindi ako masaktan. Sana ako yung unahin nya, pero mukhang malabo eh. May something na sila non e, pwede bang snob-in nya yun? Malamang hindi. Pero sana maging masaya ako sa birthday ko, Sana kahit paano, maramdaman ko ulit yung dating sya noong mga panahong sobrang okay namin, tipong walang pwedeng mangielam o pumasok sa kung anong meron kami noon. Sana maranasan ko ulit na ako yung priority nya. Sana magbasa sya ulit ng blog ko, sana i-stalk nya ulit yung account ko, Sana ibalik nalang kung ano kami noon. Pero alam kong malabo. Hanggang "SANA" nalang ako...

Sunday, December 14, 2014

122114

My birthday is coming!!!! And it isn't fun. I can't feel any excitement.

Ewan ko ba. Feeling ko hindi magiging masaya yung birthday ko. Bungad na bungad pa nga lang saken ng december di na maganda e. Yes i know i think negative. Pero ewan ko ba. -_- yun nafifeel ko ngayon e.

Before, akala ko talaga magiging happy happy na. Ang saya kasi noon e. Hehehe. Tapos noon, naeexcite ako sa birthday ko. Pero habang papalapit, di ko na alam.

Hmm. Sana maging masaya ako sa December 21. Sana :) Sana. :)

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Almost is Never Enough

YUNG NANDUN KA NA. REACH NA REACH MO NA!
pero may kumontra na naman.

ALMOST IS NEVER ENOUGH. :(
kelan kaya yung wala ng hadlang. yung masaya nalang lagi.
okay na sa lahat eh. sa lahat ng nakapaligid sken. sya nlang kulang. WAHAHA.
eh wala e. start from scratch nanaman ako. AKALA KO PA NAMAN.
SAYANG LANG
eh wala eh, okay lang. hahaha. It's your loss, after all. :)
Maging masaya nalang at tanggapin natin kung ano ang nagyayari sa atin ngayon.
THANKS BE TO GOD! :)

ALMOST IS NEVER ENOUGH

I'd like to say we gave it a try
I'd like to blame it all on life
Maybe we just weren't right,
But that's a lie,
That's a lie


And we can deny it as much as we want
But in time our feelings will show
'Cause sooner or later, we'll wonder why we gave up
The truth is everyone knows


Almost
Almost is never enough

So close to being in love
If I would have known that you wanted me
The way I wanted you
Then maybe we wouldn't be two worlds apart
But right here in each others arms

And we almost
We almost knew what love was
But almost is never enough


If I could change the world overnight
There'd be no such thing as goodbye
You'll be standing right where you were
And we'd get the chance we deserve


Try to deny it as much as you want
But in time our feelings will show
'Cause sooner or later, we'll wonder why we gave up
The truth is everyone knows


Almost
Almost is never enough
So close to being in love
If I would have known that you wanted me
The way I wanted you, oh
Then maybe we wouldn't be two worlds apart
But right here in each others arms

And we almost
We almost knew what love was
But almost is never enough

(Huh) oh, huh oh
(Oh baby) hmm
(You know) oh
(You know baby)
(Almost)

Baby baby baby (is not enough baby)
(You know) huh huh
(Huh yeah)


And we can deny it as much as we want
But in time our feelings will show
'Cause sooner or later, we'll wonder why we gave up
The truth is everyone knows


Almost
Almost is never enough (is never in enough babe)
(We were) so close to being in love (So close)
If I would have known that you wanted me (that you wanted me)
The way I wanted you, babe
Then maybe we wouldn't be two worlds apart
But right here in each others arms

And we we almost
We almost knew what love was (baby)
But almost is never enough

(Huh)
(Oh baby) almost
(You know) hey
(You know baby)
(Almost)
(Is never enough baby) never
(At all)
(Hey ey ey)