It was all me

Everything is happy at first but when it is at second, it was all a disaster.
This is a sad story of my life. Beware of it.
I met a wonderful guy who made me happy and feel alive again. No expectations, no assumptions. Just the "kilig" and happiness. We used to talk for hours. We used to chat for hours. We used to miss each other a lot. We used to. "USED TO". Until it was almost over. Almost done. Almost nothing. Or should I say none at all.
People always make ways to drift away my happiness. There was always a villain in a scene. It would be impossible for me to stop those hindrances. Well, I USED TO FEEL THAT WAY. "ALWAYS". Maybe i will never be someone's first this time. I'm always the one who makes them feel the life in a lighter way. But how 'bout me? Who can help me carry those heavy loads I get whenever I made a person feel lighter? Who would help me stand up whenever I fall off the ground? All these time, it was all me helping myself. I am the only one. Sad but true. :)

A piece of advice fellas: If your friend likes someone, don't try to grab the opportunity to have it coz sometimes, you'll never know that it is the only hope they're holding on.

Stop the Feelings

What am I feeling? I feel so afraid to continue what I am feeling. Di ko alam kung kaya ko ba 'to icontinue.

These past few days, I have this doubts, hesitations and questions about what is the real score of my heartstrings. It just came. Suddenly, I started to feel affected, jealous, demanding. I don't know why.

Before, we've been through this everyday agenda. We do it for so long and it just happened that I feel something weird. I started to feel some butterflies inside my stomach and I can't help it. I don't want and I don't want. You know why? Because I can't lose him. I won't.

Everyday I am praying that my babee would also fall inlove with me, he's the one telling me to STOP DAYDREAMING OF WHAT YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW WILL NOT HAPPEN. From every moment I wish that Babee must do this to me, must appreciate me. He's the one fulfilling it. He's the one who never bothered to be with me, never stop listening to my pointless dramas. He make some time for me, he treats me. Maybe he's just my REAL bestfriend. My true bestfriend whom I should put my time and efforts first. And I am thankful that he's there. <3 p="">
But lately, I feel so affected. I hate it. Pag pinagpatuloy ko 'to. Hohopia nanaman ako. Kaya sana di na matuloy kasi alam ko naman ako nanaman ang mahuhulog wala namang sasambot. Lol.